Saturday, July 12, 2008

My happiest flying face

I'm on my way to Seattle and I'm not a happy camper about flying but I'm putting on my happiest flying face...
Then I decided to try again before I send the pic to my husband so he knows I'm thinking about him. He's been wanting to add a photo of me to my profile on his Blackberry so the least I could do was make sure it was the best smile I could do given my current situation.

I hate flying and avoid it whenever I can though I didn't always fear being airborne. My aversion most likely started around the time I made frequent trips between California and Nevada to see my sweetheart, whom I was dating long-distance at the time. The flight was so short, the plane descended as soon as it had ascended which is where (I've heard) things are more likely to go wrong.

I don't like the gut-wrenching feeling in my stomach, watching the ground beneath me dwindle away and the roar of the engines in my ears. The slightest turbulence sent me to borderline panic mode, thinking this is it--where going down and I'll never see my loved ones again.

Maybe I felt that I had less control over flying; my life was in the pilot's hands. His mistake can cost me my life and there's NOTHING I can do about it. I know statistically I'm more likely to die in a car accident but at least I feel like I have some control over my risk on the road. I can drive slower, anticipate the moves of other drivers, etc. and hopefully avoid potentially fatal situations. With flying, I'm not the pilot and in control (though I'm actually glad I'm not in the cockpit).

Despite knowing in general how airplanes fly, it's seems kind of wrong to me for this huge metal/aluminum capsule thing--full of seats, hundreds of people, luggage, cargo and pounds of fuel flying through the air at 36,000 feet.

So to help deal with my flying anxiety, I stopped for a Bloody Mary before boarding my flight.

Before I knew it, we were above the clouds, which looked deceivingly secure below as if they were cushions of pillow to land on should we fall out of the sky.



But I can put aside my fear for this trip. The view below was beautiful and not threatening for once. I'm going to see my mom and dad so it's worth the angst to fly again.

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